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Current Message Return to posts
From: LP12
A reader writes to agony Uncle Denkis.

Dear Denkis,

I think Iím becoming mentally ill but Iím not sure what treatment there could be ó other than maybe the passing of time. But that hasnít helped so far.

My close childhood friend died very suddenly of Covid at 41, leaving behind two young girls, and I miss her. The loss feels so cruel.

My wife lost her great job of a decade ó due to a new manager constructively dismissing her. The incredibly long, stressful court process was delayed by the pandemic. We had no legal representation. She won, but the process had a huge mental impact ó a period of anxiety/depression and loss of confidence. She now has a permanent job but the feelings remain.

Our son is now full-time home-educated since the pandemic due to his severe medical condition being mis-managed in school.

Home education has brought us much joy but thereís an injustice: he should be able to attend school like others. This and other issues with him have drained me.

A drunk or drugged driver hit our car at 1am shunting it into the telephone pole outside our home, bringing the pole half down, and the car was a write-off.

Our home was ruined by shoddy workmanship despite using a supposedly reputable firm. The cost-of-living crisis has somehow made me feel utterly neurotic about everything we pay for because of how fast it has been spiralling ó and Iíve been doing bizarre things like bulk buying things I donít like or need. A sort of weird survival instinct?

All that on top of everything that everyday life brings ó from family and friendship dynamics, pet death, menopause of the wife and day-to-day living.

I just want to retreat. Iím a mere shadow of my happier former self and doubt I will ever get back to who I was. I have spoken to my GP about feeling anxious and unwell but she was on her last work day before retirement and didnít seem very interested. I was prescribed various medications which I didnít feel were right for my symptoms.

I now feel a deep sense of daily sadness as if future life is all doom, dark and bleak and nothing will ever improve again. I do appreciate some of this is grief but I am really struggling ó existing rather than living.

Should I give it more time, or seek professional help? Iím on a waiting list for talking therapies ó about four months. I donít want sympathy. I know how hard many others have it and feel guilt even for sharing, because what gives me the right to moan? Life could be far worse.

Deckis writes ...
Trig, I told u, ur banned!

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