Did Jesus not officially start a movement and come up with the name Christian? I guess not as he was crucified
around 32? Or maybe he did a Jimi Hendrix/Janice Joplin/Kurt Cobain, went at 27(James Dean 23, Porche Speeder? vs Ford farmer)
Was Jesus of Nazeth jewish, or Arab. He was the son of a carpenter (all this is going on the basis he lived. We know people were alive 2000 years ago as the pyramids were built by someone, along with teh Collesium). So assuming Jesus of Nazereth was created in the usual way, his dad had sex with his mother, and for some reason the parents weren't at home when she was heavily pregnant, they were out and about with a donkey.
What did Jesus' dad Joseph do for a living? If he was called Joseph (as in the amazing technicoloured dream coat) we could assume he ws 'Jewish'. No need to put that in quotes if he was 100% kosher and had been circumsised. But what if Joseph was born to a Jewish son who married a non Jewesse? Female Jew.
Then Joseph would be a bastard. Not a Jew, not an arab, and so end up wandeing around Canan? with his pregnant wife on a donkey. It makes sense.
The young Jesus (perhaps the-to-come-later Jesuit movement was based on him as leader) would have grown up, in Nazereth, after the family moved out the stable in Bethlehem with wood and other chips. on his shoulders. He may have taken on his parents anxieties about being 2nd class citizens.
Did Jesus ever say, you know what, my mother was a virgin. Did anyone ever take him seriousy when he said that.
We can assume he never said that. Crucially, as with so much other stuff, that came later.
Perhaps his mother, Mary was Jewish. This would have given Jesus the right to wander around the temple and interact and be more free to critisize his own religon.
Fast forward to when Jesus was the same age as Great Thunberg now. He'd done a wood work apprentiship, knew how to make furniture but wasn't happy with how society ran.
He came up with an alternative way. A second way. He began to preach, as if he were at Speaker's Corner in that London.
Was he around when the Sparticus rebellion took place? Or later. I think a bit earlier but a quick fact check would discover this. But he would have seen plenty of people stuck on crosses. Hanging around on the sides of roads.
These crosses would have had a big effect on him. a) they would have seemed to the carpenter in him to be a tremendous waste of wood, wood that could be used for cups plates tables chairs beds etc.
To cut a long story short, perhaps the man who invented IKEA is infact the son of the son of god.
Canibalism? Sacrifice? what's all that about as it seems 'blood libels' and eating of babies followed around Jewish communities from about 1066 onwards. Was it part of the culture Jesus would have objected to?
Re 3 gods in one, again, this carries over to IKEA and hte hot dogs in the restaurant. Loss leaders, hot dogs 3 for a quid.*
*note this may sound ridiculous, IKEA hot dogs and teh founder of IKEA being the 2nd christ, but trust me it is no more ridiculous than any of the other stuff. And when you see how much you can get into those blue bags, that's an actual miricle right there. ALso, how anyone can pronounce the names of any product, another miracle, that someone actually thought, nah i'll be fine, call those shelves, Sfoeehfpuiee
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